#makes me very frustrated
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something I think we need to acknowledge is that, Yes, character.ai is terrible garbage because of the reasons mentioned above and people shouldn't use it, but the solution is NOT as simple as "just find other people to rp with, lol"
The reason people are drawn to the idea of writing with chat bots in the first place is because they've already tried that and found that rp communities and writing with yourself is a very difficult task to be able to do, especially with particularly judgemental groups and without immediate friends to do it with. That's like saying "just make friends"-- it's not that simple, and finding people that click with the way your writing works or even the ideas you're interested in can be a very isolating experience. ESPECIALLY if you are disabled in some way such as having ADHD, chronic pain, or other issues that make it difficult to keep up with writing style and time management that many RP partners or groups require.
And even more than that, some people who turn to character.ai are trying things out with characters and themselves because they feel lonely. If you're writing rp with someone, you likely don't want to have them pick a character for you to be so you can cater to all of their desires and do something like self-ship, kink, or even just asking the characters weird questions or pretending they're friends with them. RP is a two way street-- you're wanting to write so you can get something out of it, too. But sometimes people want to escape into things catered specifically to them in ways that would make most RP writers cringe or feel uncomfortable accommodating. This leaves people who are relying on that sort of escapism without many good outlets.
While I agree that none of these things are excuses for using character.ai, don't dismiss the experiences of the people who are usually needing it most as something so simple to fix, especially if you aren't personally planning on sitting there and doing those things with strangers on the internet yourself. Dismissing the feelings of these people will serve to just make them feel more alone, and they're likely to not want to listen to you and become frustrated in the long run.
There is no current fix or solution to fill in the gap for the people in these communities, but at the very least we must extend understanding if we hope to be able to work towards finding a way to end AI takeover and help artists and writers alike be recognized once again.
#character.ai#makes me very frustrated#I have dealt with the same problems as the people who have been desperate enough to use ai#and I feel just as alone as them#just Finding RP partners is not the end all solution people think it is#it is so hard for an rp to actually continue and go well in the right direction#and even harder to find people who actually care about the characters and ideas you put out#even in communities that should be centered around that.
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the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again
#yeehaw#1k#5k#10k#posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours?#also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that!#unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference#edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense#also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags#1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now#he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic#2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use 🆗?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign#like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock#3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing#it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is#extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once#it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life#i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about#Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect#if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it#aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week
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I feel like many people have a fundamental misconception of what unreliable narrator means. It's simply a narrative vehicle not a character flaw or a sign that the character is a bad person. There are also many different types of unreliable narrators in fiction. Being an unreliable narrator doesn't necessarily mean that the character is 'wrong', it definitely doesn't mean that they're wrong about everything even if some aspects in their story are inaccurate, and only some unreliable narrators actively and consciously lie. Stories that have unreliable narrators also tend to deal with perception and memory and they often don't even have one objective truth, just different versions. It reflects real life where we know human memory is highly unreliable and vague and people can interpret same events very differently
#the way some people (usually lestat fans lol) talk about louis being an unreliable narrator has frustrated me#i still insist louis' unreliableness is mostly subtle (passing quickly over things he doesn't want to think about#presenting things that factually happened in a way he can build a story that makes sense to him#not knowing what lestat is thinking and feeling so interpreting him differently than lestat himself probably would)#rather than he's telling something that didn't really happen or is under armand's mind control or something#like for example i think it's been made very clear all the abuse really happened they're not gonna suddenly pull the rug from under it#if anything i feel lestat is going to turn out to be even worse than louis perceived him when we hear people who are not in love w him lol#keanu.txt
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2.08 | 3.04
#bridgertonedit#polinedit#colinbridgertonedit#perioddramaedit#perioddramasource#weloveperioddrama#onlyperioddramas#**#bridgerton#polin#otp: you are special to me#did i make these b/w bc i got frustrated trying to color the second gif and gave up? maybe so#also dont know if this has been made yet but i havent seen it#but its the way in the first one he says come w me and grabs her hand#and the second one he asks her to come and reaches out his hand for her to grab#and how in the first one the implications that exist w propriety and society w him pulling her into a private room alone#and how that could very easily have resulted in her being compromised or a forced engagement/marriage and then didnt#and it wasnt even something on his mind at all (even if it was on hers)#vs the second one which does result in a proposal (and which also involved a compromising situation) that was very much intentional from#him (and unexpected for her)
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The Quest Continues...
(part 1- part 2)
#Fourfold Soul#<- That's the title of the project I've been working on!#I am very excited to finally show off the cowboy (gender redacted) I've been cooking in a slow boil!!! Yeehaw!#Yes this is the game project. YES I am commited to the bit of having the main character go through a long running pronoun-quest.#This character does not have a name so I cannot formally tag them...#(Okay. Technically they have an internal name for coding/scripting reasons...and I have a nickname for them.#But the important part of making a video game character you get to eventually name is that the name must come from *you*!)#The girl here is a npc so she has a temporary name. So I also cannot tag her. Hmm...#I have several FFS comics thumbnailed out. This one got made first because it's the funniest without context. Lore wise it's weak.#I would love to post the sexy clown but you have to wait just a few more comics.#Fun artist woes moment to share: This is the first time I've had to colour these characters traditionally. *That* was NOT fun.#Going from a specific digital colour palette to being at the whims of my limited colour choices in markers? Hell! On! Earth!#I might also be extra frustrated because this sure is 3x the length of what I usually do for comics! I spent a Whole Day on this.#Past me thought it was soooo funny and needed all the extra panels for pacing. I hate past me. That guy needs to be exploded.
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maffhew who refuses to say runebergin torttu because he knows hes gonna butcher it so bad he might be kicked out of the country the second he tries and staunchly avoids that by going "the one dessert that barky is going to have to explain 😃"
sasha who gets faced with the most generic description of everything hes ever eaten in his life so far because of maffhew and going "???... oh you mean runebergin torttu!"
"he did good he liked the food and he likes the finland so far so its good" sasha says with so much pride now that all the anxiety has left his system that his husband teammate is enjoying his country and doesnt hate it
media availability | 10.29.24 (x)(x)
the smile of a man who knowlingly doomed his husband and said husband using all his brain power to context clues his way to whatever the fuck he just got asked that his brain is running hotter than a mid 2012 macbook air thats somehow still alive in the year of the lord 2024 but girl does she chug along shes louder than a fighter jet
#matthew tkachuk#aleksander barkov#florida panthers#2425#the famous vanha kauppahalli date™#we know how bad he is at pronouncing words not in english he does not want to fuck up his husbands language in front of him#(the nhl stars try to speak german video has entered the chat)#different attitudes here lmao#“he did good” mate he was... eating food... what... what is there to praise here..?#i shivered sweet mary and joseph sasha this is how you praise maffhew? yeah id be an annoying little shit about it too#whatever they have. unexplainable. i wont even bother#im glad to see pie and cake are still very confusing for esol#somehow ive had the conversation with several different people in my lifetime and realised even i dont know what the fuck it is#in the sense that when i translate pastries into english for my american friends i just pause and go#wait... i think this is a pie... but its called a tart in spanish but its also kind of a cake? and- [windows reboot sound]#ive had to do this with pastafrola and im like please just eat it dont make me explain im gonna cry if i do#I DONT KNOW WHAT IT IS IN AN ENGLISH CONTEXT BECAUSE IT DOESNT EXIST IN AN ENGLISH CONTEXT TO ME JUST EAT IT#“so whats the difference between a torta and a tarta and isnt a tarta kinda like a pie-” “stop asking questions you dont want answers to”#you have no idea how upset i get trying to explain#im glad sasha at least protrays a little of that frustration by going “i dont know english word” girl SAME
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wwdits is so fun if you dont watch it only looking for Nandermo Confirmation moments. ngl its astounding how many of you seem to completly disregard that this is a sitcom with plenty other characters and funny stories and you just get mad like youre owed an yaoi asap
#also the impatience like#this season is soooooo very clearly focused on the two of them#but since its not going fast enough or in your face enough yall are losing your goddamn minds#this has been said oh so many times but jesus its a fucking sitcom#the creators have never had the intention of making anything that serious#the joke always comes first for them#which is not my ideal way to build narrative but that has always been the motto of wwdits#so why people still act frustrated when that happens is beyond me#wwdits#what we do in the shadows#nandor the relentless#guillermo de la cruz#nandermo
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Not a big fan of capitalism
#i do not want to charge people to see my art#i have a job on top of doing this little art blog#every time i show this little project of mine people tell me i better find a way to monetize it to make money off of this#its just very frustrating to constantly have to explain that i want people to just see and cherish my drawings#i dont want to be reliant on making art to make my money i think that'd not work with what im going for#and it would turn art into a deeply frustrating experience i try to constantly optimize to get the most amount of money from#rendering experiments and trying out new artstyles something that could legit put me out of eating food 👍#but really#the job is not good for me i am always do exhausted#it really takes so much effort to draw sometimes
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having seen at least the rough outlines of all the romances now I have to say that I think emmrich's is probably objectively the best in terms of coherence and completeness of story arc (with the understanding that ultimately the 'best' romance is whichever one makes YOUR heart sing anyway so objectivity is a silly thing to claim that way, it just felt like it's the arc with the most well-paced focused content and the least dangling threads)... but lucanis' is my favourite haha. just. the whole kneeling before your beloved full of reverence but without any of the distance that usually implies??? his complete undramatic certainty and calm in every scene with rook after this, having spent the whole game caught between fear and longing???? mr. lives in a pantry but it says nothing about my psyche don't worry about it it's purely for tactical reasons that I keep myself contained in a small dark room not entirely unlike a cell, love among the parsnips -- finally coming to rook in their room and it's so comfortable and comforting???? after all the times rook supports and comforts him through the game he's finally able to return the same to them when they need it while being so calm and steady and it's so fucking sweet and feels so effortless and with no price attached?????? he basically assigns himself the role of your bodyguard and he WILL stab a god over it??????????????? the turn to protector (which was in his heart all along longing to get out and find a place) of it all????? he sounds like he's found himself unexpectedly stumbling into such a soul-lightening state of revelatory existential relief, full on 'you only have to let the soft animal of your body love what it loves' mary oliver style, and he goes and he shares that with rook and protectively envelops them in it when they're hurting??????????????????????????? hello for the maker's sake hello can anyone hear me?????
#listen I was forged in the fires of garrusmancing. I went through two whole games just to get a gentle headbutt and some tender words#before me3 comes along and rewards you for your tenacity more fully#me? the reyes romancer???? I have the strength and headcanon game to bear the relative lack of content before the end#when the endgame is this good I am willing to hold out for it haha the way he looks at rook towards the end......#I also really liked taash' (it's really sweet) but I don't think I have any rooks ready to go right now who would go for that vibe#emmrich for sure is going to be my either crow or shadow dragon romance it really is very good! and extremely goth not unrelatedly#undeniably that old man has the most game out of anyone in this story. the move with the flower??? I'm sorry????#I actually like that lucanis' romance blooms out of the safety of an established friendship more than anything (again. avowed garrusmancer)#but emmrich... he's got some next level romantic stuff going on and is being both so wholesome and such a freak about it lmao#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard#dragon age: the veilguard spoilers#dragon age spoilers#lucanis dellamorte#rook x lucanis#rookanis#all jokes aside I totally respect and understand that people are a bit disappointed and frustrated -- they're not wrong to feel that!#there really are some gaps in content there for the midgame#however I was personally custom built by experience to get the most out of this scenario as possible and by god I will#just as I feel that ryder and reyes go off and have some soul-shrivingly good sex after the first kiss#(it makes that arc make a lot more sense to me haha)#I think rook and lucanis Get Up To It after the second coffee date. weird of them to not show us that but okay I'll fill it in myself then
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What do you get when, after you worked so hard Changing the first time, you're forced into a body that isn't yours and your have to stare at the person you used to be while regressing and battling against a new worse kind of dysphoria?
Being a cunt honestly :P
aka loopsabeau is a dick to isabeau as a version of 'killed them so i could live' but killing a timelooper is not permanent and really it's more satisfying to be the person they BOTH hate
#isabeau#isabeau isat#in stars and time#isat#isat spoilers#fanart#loopsabeau's stardust equivalent for isabeau is pincushion hehe#it also often says 'let's put a pin in that'#when isa points it out loopsabeau neither confirms nor denies the implied connection#if loop and siffrin is 'i've built this personality to specifically get on your nerves'#this is 'i hate that i can't be you' and 'if i hate myself so much i'll make you hate me too' etc#me and the isat group i got kinda built the idea that isabeau is actively kind because he didn't use to be#kindness being a learnt skill rather than something innate perhaps#loopsabeau has kinda regressed back to hating itself but instead of wallowing in sorrowful loneliness#it would rather be angry and hateful and might even get a kick out of very specifically getting isabeau to snap back#a blessing in disguise i suppose when isabeau gets more frustrated in his own loops that he doesn't want to lash out at the party#why shout at someone you care about when you can talk shit to an inanimate object :P#that's essentially the vibes :P also i wanted to draw a scowling isa :P
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Kingdom Hearts Dream Drop Distance - Traverse Town
#kingdom hearts dream drop distance#khddd#traverse town#scenery#my gif#trying my hand at giffing the worlds of this game despite the lack of a first person view (something i'm very upset about)#so i have to obtain and edit these shots in a very awkward manner#all while constantly being shoved around by my dream eaters#i'm so serious when i say making this set was really really frustrating lol#i can't find a free roaming camera mod or anything else that would be helpful for me#but i'll keep at it because i love looking at still shots of video game environments#and being able to share it with other people who enjoy it too#ANYWAYS traverse town is so beautiful in this game they added so many gorgeous areas with pretty glowing lights#i like the wacky whimsical mail room too and how there's this entire secret workshop hidden beneath that weird mailbox haha#the world really does feel magical and dreamy especially with its updated music#just realized the stars in the first gif are moving which is strange
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part 14
oh no! raphs brain :( ...anyway
⇇ | ⇽ | index | ⇾
#rottmnt#rottmnt rapheal#rottmnt michelangelo#rottmnt leonardo#rottmnt splinter#rottmnt residuum comic#residuum#c#g#oh man im cuttn it close with this one ahah#had a dream that yall were complaining about how much i post updates#it was very weird#but eugh boy it kinda frustrates me how much set up im having to do#it make it look like nothing is happening but i swear there is somehting important happening in every single update#but since you guys dont know anything about future events... eurghg#sad face
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see like the thing with 'carewhumpers' as a concept to me is it just like... i know this is prrrrobably not really how it's meant but something skeeves me out about the idea that kindness or caretaking mixed in with hurting someone can somehow meaningfully complicate or dilute the harm done to the point of making that character no longer a 'whumper' whereas someone doing the same 'bad' things but not ever being gentle or caring for them would just be a straight-out whumper. when like... that's how 90% of irl abuse dynamics work? so i just... don't really get the point, i guess. like to me it implies something about the 'care' provided somehow mitigating or combating the harm done that. i just do not personally appreciate or enjoy.
#gav gab#just thinking out loud#like i don't think that's 'nuance' or 'grey characters' i think that's just an extremely common and typical dynamic of abuse#someone breaking your nose and then cleaning up the blood and tucking you into bed is not less like#violent or abusive or harmful than someone who just stops at breaking your nose yk#and i think that it can successfully be summarized by any number of other ways?#carewhumper is just not useful or meaningful shorthand to me the way caretaker/whumper/whumpee are#it implies that the word 'caretaker' or 'whumper' encompasses 100% of a person's constant behaviour#in a very flattened and simplistic way#please do not come at me about this im not saying this is how everyone means it this is just#how i personally feel about it#due to the way i approach these words#and im not trying to say anyone CANT write about very typical abusive dynamics#im just saying the elements of like. 'good' behaviour or 'kind' treatment#doesn't make the Bad Part any less real or bad#the way that 'carewhumper' being set as a different or distinct thing than 'whumper' implies to me#i just feel insane whenever i see people using the term tbh like this is probably a me thing#a very stupid distinction to get hung up on#but i just. im always like isn't that just a whumper who's nice sometimes#what is the utility of this word if not to imply that#someone being nice sometimes meaningfully combats how cruel they are other times#what part of 'whumper' means they always have to be violent and awful 24/7#and do not take this to mean caretakers are never allowed to fuck up#or do anything wrong or get frustrated#or anything like that but that is like#very distinct from being a whumper of any kind at all#like the idea that a 'whumper' can only be 100% a sadist who means to cause harm and intends to cause harm every time is like#cmon now
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I say this in the kindest way possible, but I think this style of prose is more appropriate for a personal account rather than an update account. I have no idea who's being talked about half the time. 🥲
[ Tumblr meme via @mikaikaika ]
#QSMP#Philza#Edited#Phil#Let me know if this needs an additional tag#I don't think this necessitates a discourse or neg tag or whatever because I'm being silly but I'm happy to add one if folks need it#I won't post this one on Twitter I don't think because I genuinely don't want to hurt anyone's feelings#but. I feel very strongly about this. It's not helpful#I say this as a fan and as a professional writer (who also worked in the Marketing and Communications field for far too long)#The prose is nice! It's very whimsical and they're having fun! But I don't think it's appropriate for an updates account#I recently turned off notifications for QsmpEN and I'm considering muting them because half the updates just aren't helpful to me#I want to be able to speed read through the update thread I don't want to spend an additional 30 seconds trying to decipher who's who#I don't like posting complaints so I tried to make it a funny complaint#because I do think feedback is good! And I know I'm not the only one who feels this way#but at the same time: these update writers ARE volunteers#(As a side note -- I personally think anyone running a large social media account should be paid)#(I did that for a few years and it was hell. I can't imagine doing that and NOT getting paid for it)#But anyways#They're all volunteers so I don't actually wanna go all pitchforks and torches on them (which I wouldn't do anyways even if they WERE paid)#I'm just venting my frustrations in what is (hopefully) a funny way#but you're welcome to disagree! That's ok too#Portfolio
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That feeling when he can't stand to see you that way, no matter what you do, no matter what you say😩😭💔
#scott pilgrims precious little life#scott pilgrim vs the world#spvtw#spto#scott pilgrim#wallace wells#lisa miller#scollace#kim pine#natalie adams#envy adams#don't rlly know if I like how this turned out but oh well;;;#hope its obvious that this is based on the song “Scott Pilgrim” which the creation the comics were inspired from#the lyrics always make me think of Wallace and Lisa's feelings for Scott every time I hear it#ofc you could also relate it to Kim especially since the singers voice kind of reminds me of her#but overall the lyrics fit these two much better since Scott never truly “saw them that way” despite how long they've liked him#and they always seem happier to see him compared to Kim#Im surprised tho that I havent yet seen anyone draw these two together now that their dialogue parallels have been acknowledged more lately#also tho I wish more people pointed out that they both got cucked by red heads LOL#and Kim and Envy actually do look really similar when scott first meets them#makes me wonder if Scott subconsciously went for Envy since she reminded him of Kim (which would be fitting given that you could argue that#Envy dated Scott because he reminded her of Todd. Since he and Scott are confirmed to be meant to be seen as similar to one another#so much so that even their first and last names rhyme#last thing I'll add tho is that while Wallace and Lisa are very similar even personality wise#the one big difference is that despite that whole conclusion on vol4 of Scott not cheating on Ramona with Lisa because he loves her#the writers apparently think it would be “organically correct” for him to have an affair with wallace LMAO#but I guess we shouldn't be surprised since Wallace and Ramona are both in the front of the official valentines art which is clearly#a deptiction of Scotts wet dream or smth (oh and you could also argue that Wallace and Lisa parallel on that art since they're both#shirtless with white socks.. which could be a reference to how lisa wears skimpy clothes for Scott and Wallace often only wears boxers#to like sexually frustrate Scott for fun or smth
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It honestly baffles me that some people are so casually dismissive of animals' feelings. Istg some ppl only see pets like toys and are barely able to hide it
#vent post alert#but I'm just so frustrated#my mom's dog got hit by a car yesterday and she refused to take him to the vet#she said she doesn't have any money for it and that he's fine#physically he seems fine just bruised. I think he might have something internal but she's been very dismissive of that#anyway. he spent the whole night crying bc he was alone and terrified#I went upstairs and almost begged her to take him to the vet but she still refused saying he was fine#then she put him inside her house and he calmed down after a while#the next morning when she came downstairs to talk to me she kept being dismissive#saying he was fine in the end he just wanted attention#and I'm like yeah?? obviously?? he got hit by a car???? the poor thing is traumatized and terrified#ofc he doesn't want to be alone#and she hit me with the 'dogs don't get traumatized. he's just being dramatic'#I pointed out some dogs have psychological pregnancy so ofc they have psychological problems too#and THEN she hit me with 'but those are female dogs. males are different. because hormones' like. WHAT#this just in not only do human males not have feelings but now dog males don't either. because hormones.#I thought my mom was smarter than this tbh#istg her boyfriend is just making her more ignorant. bc this is the kind of bs I expected to hear from him but not from her#anyway I don't know what to do. I don't have money for the vet either bc I just had to pay for a surgery#we talked and she said she'll monitor the dog and if he looks like he's getting worse she'll take him to the vet#ig I'll have to settle for that#I love my mom but man. this is weird#I just didn't expect it from her#what's worse is that when it's just her and me it's one thing. but when her bf is around I feel like she gets different#like with me she agrees but then around him she doesn't?? how am I supposed to trust her that way#it's all just so weird. idk what to think or what to feel rn. I just feel bad#sleep.txt
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